November 16, 2011

Making Myself Happy

I have one wedding left to edit.
After that is done...I'm taking my hobby back.
Enjoying what I do is far more important than making money.
Having fun is far more important than stressing out.
Feeling free of guilt is far more important than feeling guilty.
I have been stressing over deadlines that I begin to feel guilty about grocery shopping, laundry and even checking email.
I feel guilty for snapping photos of my kids when I should be doing something else.

How bad is that? Feeling guilty for my kids? No more.

I'm taking my priorities back.

Is there something that you thought would make you happy, only to find out that it really wasn't what you wanted? Please tell me I'm not alone in feeling this way.


  1. I felt this way for a while about photography as well. It killed the joy I had for personal projects, so I took some time off. Unfortunately, it was just that I needed to learn how to balance everything. I've gone back to making it my living, even though at one point I was in the same situation you were in.

    But YOU are your own boss. When we set extremely high standards for ourselves, we can tend to push ourselves too far. Book ONE wedding a month. Or if that is too much, one every other months. In the in between, only book three portrait session- you get the idea. Find what works for you, but only if it is indeed working.

    Every time you do something you love as a job there is a little aspect of it sucking sometimes. You just have to find a balance and discover once that balance is reached- do the hard not-so-fun times outweigh the fun?

  2. I have SERIOUS guilt issues, and then I rebel against them with laziness, which causes more guilt. It's a vicious cycle that never stops as long as I have to clean, cook, and do laundry. And if I have homework to do but watch TV instead, fuhgetaboutit. Take your priorities back girl! And while you're at it, give yourself permission to do what you want and feel like at any given time. Sure, you still have responsibilities and commitments, but a lot of things can be gotten out of ;o).